Alas, another weekend has gone by and not once was i wasted singing show tunes and 80s top 40 hits on the streets of the east village. No. For the past couple of days I found myself at home, in my room trying to figure out how to set up the damn AirPort Express that I got in the mail, for the sole reason of lying in bed and blogging while the canned laughter coming from a B-rated sitcom underscores my musings. I finally got it to work, so now I’m in bed blogging with the TV on- Just what I’ve always wanted!
Because my mother possesses a soviet socioeconomic mentality, we rarely have tasty snacks around the house to munch on like other normal, for the most part American families. I’ve always envied friends who got to drink apple juice out of a cute box, with a bendy straw and gnaw on Fruit by the Foot wrapped around their index finger, while i sat by myself in the lunch room looking down on my plate of herring and boiled potatoes. The reason I’m saying this is because i wish I had a snack, something to munch on in between these paragraphs of prolific wisdom. All we have right now are some caramels and a bag of dried fish that would actually go really well with some German brew, but alas there’s none of that either.
Anyway, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking and a lot of doing based on my thinking, and what I did was get myself a real job. I finally got myself an adult kinda gig in the corporate world. I don’t know how I did it. I have no experience in working in a corporate world or being an adult, and starting monday I’m going to have to be both. (By adult gig i mean office, business suit, 401k NOT web cams, bikinis and butt plugs) This is just for clarification purposes. Making this decision was not easy-after all I am giving up some dreams here for the sake of not having to dumpster dive every day for a piece of bread or a sweater. But I came up with a 3 year plan, which I think is a smart plan and perhaps after this time, I can make something of myself and move on. I want to do so many things with my life in the future. I have so many dreams and I guess I don’t want to spend my youth working paycheck to paycheck and not ever enjoying my life. Thusly, then, in brief I think this 9-5 thing is gonna be great for me, giving me enough freedom to be and create in my own time. I keep thinking about all those days that i spent walking around the city looking for some purpose. I’d go eat somewhere and people watch, maybe read a book, have too many glasses of wine and get way to nostalgic for my own good. I’m hoping that this job will take my mind off the past which i really think it will. I realized that your mind pulls you back when you have nothing to really focus on in the present.
The past, what a bitch she is. Now you could have had the best of times or the worst of times it doesnt matter. If you had the best of times you will spend your days sitting, drinking, eating peaches out of a can, crying into the phone and thinking about how great everything used to be-sleeping on peoples couches, eating breakfast at Best Diner on a hungover morning, having sex in mid-afternoon. Or if it wasnt such a great time, you’ll be sitting on the couch watching America’s Next Top Model Marathon, eating peaches out of a can, and blaming the awful past for turning you into a lazy fuckhead because of some unconfronted, pending fears of failure. Whatever. It doesnt matter. Living in the past is like getting left back in highschool. It sucks.
Anywho. I came up with a 2-3 year plan to get my life in order then go travelling. Selling my soul to corporate america is perhaps not the worst thing I could have done and its not like I work for Enron. I’ll pay off my student loans, get a new wardrobe, buy and iPhone and peace out to the South of France.
Je vois des grand choses en futur, peoples!
